"Late again!" the third grade teacher sternly said to little Johnny as he walked into class three hours late. "It ain't my fault this time, Miss Russell. You can blame this 'un on my Daddy. The reason I'm so late is cause my Daddy sleeps naked."
Now, Miss Russell has taught grammar school for thirty-some years. Despite her mounting fear, she asked little Johnny what he meant by that. "You see, Miss Russell, out at the farm we got this here lowdown old fox. The last few nights, he done ate six of our hens. Last night when Daddy heard a noise out in the chicken coop, he grabbed his shotgun and said to my Ma, 'That dern fox is back again. . .I'm a gonna git him! Stay back!' Daddy whispered to all us kids.
My Daddy was naked as a jaybird - no boots, no pants, no shirt. He crawled out to the henhouse just like an Injun on the prowl. Then he stuck that double-barreled 12-gauge shotgun through the window of the coop. As he stared into the darkness with that fox on his mind, our old hound dog, Rip, had done gone and woke up and come sneakin' up behind Daddy. Then, as we all looked on, plumb helpless, old Rip done went and stuck his cold nose in my Daddy's crack!
Miss Russell, we all been cleanin' chickens since three o'clock this mornin'!"
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